New Years Resolution: Gratitude

Are you here with me?

We have come to a new stage along this transition. We’re no longer individuals, isolated in the loneliness of our transformation, we are now a community that is clear and enunciated that is growing together. We are defining this, surrendering to the heart of it, reaching out with the power of our desires to reshape the definition of our reality.

We thrive, not alone, but together.

Those around us can’t help but be pulled upwards, threads along this interwoven spider’s web of the human energetic existence. Those on the edges of circles can’t help but be affected by the power of our joy. We create our dreams by holding the space for others to shine.

So who are you?

What life are you creating?

My shift started when I decided to stop binge drinking.

That decision allowed me to change my day to day existence. Removing an activity that diminished my cognitive function created space for me to develop my personal willpower and training regime. Now I still have a little glass of something at events where I’m not performing, yet that doesn’t happen too often. Every event is a new opportunity to develop my skills, and I maximize that by minimizing substances that disconnect me from everyone around me.

With that decision, with every choice that aligned with my higher happiness, I shifted.

So tonight, on the eve of the New Year, I am grateful for my community.

I am grateful to Ruby Chase, for that very first moment several years ago when we met when she opened her mouth to ask me: “Do you have any great ideas for music videos?” We’re taking our time with it, luxuriating in the delight of our growth, yet we are going there. We are co-creating the substance of our dreams.

I am grateful to Erin Eskila. She is special to me. To have such a gorgeous dancer, a solid woman whose talent which is emerging along the lines of her growth, to have such a creature seek me out so that she could tap into the beat of our happiness and create the organization and balance for it to grow – this is an experience that no one else could gift.

I am grateful for John Gray and Blossoming Lotus. Mere words cannot describe the depth of my love for you. When I try to translate this feeling in my heart when I think of you it brings me to tears.

I am grateful for Tammy Firefly. Every moment in your company feels so relaxing and delightful, especially when working to deepen the stretch or open the heart. Thank you for your existence.

I am grateful to Ariane Lab, for the intensity of her talent and her determination to bring out the same in others. The power in her grace brings my heart into a state of ecstasy whenever I experience the substance of her soul.

I am grateful to Roxanne Ruby, for her unabashed wildness, for her unapologetic sensuality which supports her get shit done production capability. Her rawrness holds space for others to be true to their own inner lioness.

I am grateful for the anchors in my life like Amanda, Chloe, Christine and Erica, who tap me back into the stories of my past so that I can see just how far I have come and how true it is to my nature. I love you all so much.

I am grateful to Avatara and Riff for their epicness and vision. Thank you for holding space for my first performances, and for continuing to spin and play with me as my skill progresses.

I am grateful to Michael Ravenwood and Anja. Thank you for every lesson, backstage or in the gym. You have been so important towards teaching me to fine tune my use of energy and flow.

I am grateful to Nick Heyming and EVO. Thank you for existing.

I am grateful for teachers such as Dr. Robert Parker, who gave me the technical knowhow and the absolute confidence in the power of my mind when facing growing in a world full of stereotypes and debasement of the feminine.

I am grateful to Windu, Mewosh, Kevin, Chris Filkins, Hanunam, Gabe, Wolfman, Nathanial, Alan, Chris Blasingame, Marc, and Mr. Kitty Cat Cheetah Platt. I am grateful for all the strong men in my life, who are not only strong in body but big of heart. I am grateful for the hours of training, the days of play, and respectfulness of open affection. I am grateful for every single moment of such beautiful company.

This is my joy, my community, my creation.

I am grateful for every person not mentioned here who has held space in this gorgeous beautiful existence we call life. I am grateful for you all.

Most of all, I am grateful for the technical and biological family which is the roots from which I grow.

This is my joy, my community, my creation.

My New Years Resolution is for ever increasing gratitude.